Good morning, Reader!
Are you a good listener? No, we are not asking you about listening to your friends’ rants, your boss’s speeches, or even a teacher’s lecture. We are asking you about listening to a conversation: listening to the conversation to absorb as much information as possible without mentally drafting your next impressive lines to say the moment is done talking. Well, that does count as good or effective listening. Moreover, most of us are guilty of not listening effectively.
For many of us, a conversation is a competition: a competition to say something wittier than the other person, to persuade others to change their opinions, or simply win an argument. We listen to counter; we don’t listen to observe and learn. This approach is fine but for how long? Don’t you think sometimes you need to listen to others to enhance your knowledge and not to show off what you know?
Wo do you think will get a better deal at the end of the day: the person to talks and seldom listens to acquire knowledge or the person who talks less and intently listens more to the conversation? Think about it.
Moreover, people, who talk more, tend to give away more than they ought to and regret it later. Sometimes, it becomes more important to learn what not to say than what to say. Not all information is for sharing particularly not anywhere and everywhere. On the contrary, when you listen to other people intently and assure them of honest interest in what they are saying, you might accidentally end up with insider information yourself. You call it manipulative, however, sometimes when you listen intently to the other person, they become confident that they are saying something that interests you. To impress you, further, they come up with something more interesting and confidential.
Finally, it is a universal truth, people who talk less are more likely to come up with something worth listening to. At least you will know their opinion on a topic (whether you agree or not, it is a separate discussion) and will have an interest in listening to them. On the other hand, when people constantly talk and share their opinion, again and again, others simply lose interest in listening to them because there is nothing new to listen to.
To be listened to, you need to listen too. Try this technique next time at a social gathering and see if beneficial this technique proves to be.